This is the weirdest thing I've ever gotten in the mail.

This was sitting in my mailbox today and it really freaked my wife out:

Amy:

Um... you just got a small plastic ball delivered to you from I don't
know where.  I'm actually a little freaked out by it.

There is no return address but it's in a plastic box manufactured by
"AMAC Plastic Securities, Pasidena, CA"  Your name and our address is
written on the ball, not on the box.

It also cost $3.50 to send it to you.

Weird... very weird.

If you know what the hell this is, please tell me, otherwise it's
staying in the mailbox.

Yah, I'm a little paranoid, but it's WEIRD!

Joe:

I have no idea.

Please don't call the police.

I had no idea that the postal service would actually mail something like this. Whoever did it went through a whole lot of trouble. It cost $3.85.

It's a little plastic container with a clear hard plastic ball inside. On the clear ball someone wrote my address (wrongly), scotch taped the box up, slapped a $3.85 stamp on top and dropped it in the mailbox.

I am decidedly afraid to open it.

What mad individual could concoct such an evil scheme? Either the ball is laced with microbes bent on infecting the whole human race or it was an attempt to make the United Postal Service go crazy trying to read an address off of a small clear ball in a box. Is it meant as a metaphor for my life, I am a little ball named Joe trapped in a cube?

Further investigation shows that the box was made by AMAC Plastic Products Corp. of Sausalito, California. But AMAC moved to Petaluma, California in 1999. That could mean that this box has been in the possession of this vile fiend for over six years! How long has he been planning this madness!

Sausalito and Petaluma are near San Francisco. Bloglines and Ask Jeeves are also near there. This could be an interview tool devised by the evil minds that work there. If the interviewee is not dead in 48 hours, then they are still in the running for a position? I plan to find out. If I was that easy to kill, I would have been gone in High School.

The address ball has given no clues as of yet. But the address was written by a Sharpie. Sharpie has been around for a long time, but this page specifically states that Sharpies are used to autograph and write on BALLS! It's almost an obvious choice, but how does it fit in with the overall plan? Is Sharpie immune to microbes? Does it make Postal workers crazier than usual? I may never know.

The stamp has no postmark on it. Instead, it's just scratched out with a pen. There is no way for me to know where it really came from. The box is pretty smashed up though. The bottom is cracked and the side is pretty bashed up too. Hopefully any poison gas or micro-organisms have already escaped into the United Postal Service citadel.

For now, I won't open it and will let it rest, but I'll be keeping one eye on it. I'll be puzzling over this until it relinquishes it's secrets. If it tries to escape from the box or starts to send signals back to the mother ship, it's going right out of this house.

I'll keep you informed.

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This entry was posted on Monday, March 7th, 2005 at 6:06 pm by Joe and is filed under General. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.